Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I understand how hurricane paths work

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

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If someone works for me, I actually pay them

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

Suspect in custody after 11 stabbed at Oregon homeless services provider - NBC News

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

My landlord just sold the house I’m renting from her. She included all fixtures, that I bought and installed. Does she have this right?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

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I can read

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

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I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

There's no way Republican Trump won all seven swing states. How was he able to cheat and steal the election?

I don’t cotton to rapists

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

“We’re Trapped in a Black Hole”: James Webb Discovery Ignites Existential Shockwave Through World’s Top Astrophysicists - Rude Baguette

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

Why COVID 'Razor Blade' Sore Throat Hurts So Bad - WebMD

I have complete contempt for fakery

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

How do you know when someone really loves you?

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I see through liars

What items do restaurant customers commonly try to steal?

I have a reading level above third grade

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

Navigating some of the thorny questions of estate planning - NPR

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

American Airlines sent a plane from the US to Italy that was too big for its destination airport and wasn't allowed to land - Business Insider

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

Can supporters of gun control explain the purpose behind a gun registry?

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

NYC summer stargazing seasons kicks off with triangle, meteor showers - Gothamist

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I don’t buy bullshit

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I actually pay taxes

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I can count

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability